this is the actual story that happened to me

For the past 2 months, me and my friend became very close through Facebook messages. She wasn’t the first girl I noticed in the class though, but It’s all started when she was having some problems. I helped her to relax more. At first we were just friends, but soon enough I began to develop a feeling of liking for her, and after that, we started our conversation daily. She was a very nice person. She’s an angel sent from heaven if I were to describe her.

For about a month or something, I realized that it would be unfair for me and for her if I would keep my feelings for her a secret. Maybe, just maybe, if I tell her, she would give me a chance… even just the smallest bit of chance for her. So one night, I decided to tell her how I really felt, how I really love her. She never seemed to care. what she replied were “lol”, “thanks”. I tried to tell her for like two or three days. Until one day I tried to make the conversation looks serious, and she said it would take sometimes. I was so sure that must be a no, but it is what it is. I calm myself down for a while.


So, I waited. Then, I’d got an idea to make a blog for her birthday, which is NOT this blog. It didn’t take so much time… about 2 days. When I was haft way to finish it, I showed to her, because it’s just a countdown timer on the front page. When her birthday comes, I’ll show it to her.
One night, I felt like the messages are replied later than normal… I don’t know. It might just be my own feeling, but that killed me inside. Whenever I started to talk about our relationship, she seemed to try to change the subject to something else.


And now I finally know the answer! What I’ve thought was real! I’ve seen it from far away. ‘told u I’m smart! 😀 I’m just saying… I knew it… I’ve learnt a lot, and a big thank to people on internet.
and… now I might have to accept the fact that she doesn’t love me, but every time we text each other, it reminds me of the pain that unrequited love gives me. She tried not to tell me directly that she doesn’t love me, but it is somehow obvious by the way she told me before.
What can I really say? I really love her, but I am just not lucky enough to be the one she really wants.. :'(

At lease I have another “best friend”

Because what’s worse than knowing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it?

I’m not crying, I swear to god, I’m not. :'(

you know, I told my friends that they should level up their games. If they get turned down, it's not a big deal. Acting like im a love/dating expert or some shit. Tell them to build up the "f*ck that b*tch" mindset, but they don't actually know that I don't like admitting that I've been hurt or feeling like a dumbass when I get rejected. I know, you might say that I'm writing this just to get over a person or try to win her heart or wtf ever....
You know, sometimes I'm just afraid to text a girl or contact her or whatever just because I'm just afraid of being ignored and shit like that, so that's why I save myself from getting ignored and sit back thinking about wtf did I do wrong or why did I just do/say that. I mean if I like this girl and I'm trying to talk but then get i ignored, It tells me that okay okay the person that I'm trying to talk with doesn't care about me, doesn't really want to talk to me, and that shit makes me questioning wtf is life? look, when I text somebody and they text back like 20-30 hours later even though I know she is not busy, I talk to myself like I'm not even on her mind so what's the f*cking point. I know a lot of guys don't like to admit it, but deep inside they're all be like: *shot triggered straight to the heart* yo, that shit f*cking hurts. I can sometimes tell myself that eh, that's just a random girl I've just met and there's millions other girls in the world, but when it's actually somebody that you think you're falling for, and you both really have talked for sometime now, then you're getting rejected or ignored, that shit is weak... damn bruh... damn... goddamn...
And now, I admit it. It hurts. And I'm not coming like a p*ssy and start crying and shit. I mean if you're talking to me, and now I'm having you on my mind, because I now focus on you and you and yes, you. and you know that I just write wtf comes to my mind right now, and that's some real shit. I know I've tried to do anything, literally, anything not to fall into that hole that will take probably a good 1 or 2 years to climb back up.
And in my case climbing up is not the point. I'll be like: yo, what did I do wrong? Why would I ever tell her that? that's not even cool I'm so lost. and that feel would probably turn me into that mindset. But it's not EASY! Sometimes I really just want that person that I could just focus on and be all about her, experience all the feels and stuff like that. And I know this thing might sound kinda cheesy, because I hate when a man saying all this shit out and got hurt. Imma be like: this f*cking p*ssy is not a real man. But now I might just have become one. I mean when you like somebody, that shit is the best experience ever! talking to her, and every time I do have that feel, it's so amazing. I dream of the things I would do for her, do with her.
Sometimes, at first that thing goes right then it starts falling down hill. and you know what? why? why do I even try, Why do i even look for shit like that? But this probably the end of this post now. if you made it here at the end, it's cool. I appreciate that. smile emoticon This post might make no sense but thanks for reading.